Wipe that look off your face, you're in the bush

Where to start. So much has happened and I’m just dying to tell it all.

We arrived at Combretum Park excited to start the Field Guide Course. I had a permanent startled look on my face cos Berdien who has a nail / beauty salon tattooed decent eyebrows on my forehead the day before we left their place. My 6 little blonde hairs and puffy eyes are now framed by the most delightful arch almost reaching up to my hairline, hence the started look. Berdien said I’d get used to them.

We were 10 students altogether. Another couple who are photographers wanting to learn more about the bush for their future plans, a guy who had been working in the field but wanted the qualifications, a young, alternate thinking German guy, and 4 other young South African guys. We all got on well luckily cos you spend a month in each others company eating, sleeping and dreaming about trees, rocks, grasses, birds and mammals. Life on the outside became a distant memory while we learnt about nature and how things work together. Awesome stuff! It was hard work remembering everything which just keeps piling up but Rainer, the lecturer at www.bushveldtrainingadventures.co.za, is a fantastic teacher. He paints a captivating picture of nature and his passion and vast knowledge of all subjects makes it easier to digest all the information. Sakkie, his partner, is a more hands on guy and has been reading the bush longer than I’ve read my ABC’s. He’s quite a character, packed with wonderful bush experiences, calls his students drolpere and is said to be the best assessor around here.

Did you know that grass has shaped the evolution of mammals? Its not just something you have to mow over the weekend, it’s actually the primary producer in a food chain.

Have you thought about the fact that rocks determine what life grows where since they make up the soil determining which plants grow there which determines what animals can survive there?

Did you know that termites farm with fungi mushrooms in their long underground tunnels which they keep at a certain temperature, not fluctuating more than 2 degrees by using air vents and that they actually place fungi spores on the backs of termites when they leave to start new colonies?

Did you know that mistletoe seeds are eaten by a bird who likes the outside layer of the seed but can’t digest the next layer so it fly’s off to another tree, regurgitates the seed which now excretes a gooey substance so when the bird wipes his beak and the seed onto a branch, the mistletoe seed grows there and that’s how it propagates.

Did you know some mammals can induce the female species to go into estrus, that a horny elephant in musth will travel up to a 100 km’s to mate with a female in a different herd as apposed to his own herd, that in fact all animals are aware of how they spread their genes by not using the same gene pool and some species will sacrifice their own sexual drive in order to ensure the packs survival.

I can go on and on with stuff like this but just cos I’m into this kinda stuff now, doesn’t mean everyone else is. I’d love to elaborate a little more on the above stuff to give you the whole picture but Theo says I’m probably boring my readers. (that is if I have any followers since its been 2 months since I’ve blogged – laptop and time problems).

During the course, we left Combretum Park for 5 days and went to the Kruger National Park to see and study the big 5 since they don’t have any at the course venue. We stayed at different camps, 2 of which were actually outside the Kruger but with open fences.

Manyaleti was the best cos we had animals right at our doorstep. Literally – in fact Rainer warned us not to walk around alone but I had no plans to become supper for the local leopard anyway. Accommodation was big comfortable tents on wooden decks with proper beds and your own inside rustic bathroom consisting of a flush toilet and to shower you boil water on the gas cooker then fill a bucket, hoist it up and there you go. Really cool. We couldn’t believe our luck when just after arriving, we were busy with a class on the braai deck when a herd of elephants sauntered past us in the dry river bed about 20 meters away. They communicate in sub sonic low rumbles by the way. If the Matriarch in the front stops then the rest don’t carry on walking, they all stop dead and all move on together. At dusk a hyena slunk past the kitchen area (I could carry on forever about them) and on the first night the German guy kakked in his pants cos while he was showering, a leopard watched him through the floor slats from under his tent.

On a guided game drive we were really lucky to see a coalition of 4 male cheetahs on the prowl looking to get laid probably. Over the next few days we saw more elephant, a big fat python slowly slither across the road, we saw birds, zebra, hippo, buffalo, crocodiles, giraffe, antelope, warthogs, rhino, a lazing lion, a hyena and feeding vultures.

My startled look was wearing off as my new eyebrows settled on my face only to reappear as we pulled in at Combretum Park to find that the farm had burnt down while we were away. Luckily none of the rooms were damaged (no thatch roof or grass nearby) but the bus got a little heat damage (got insurance luckily) and one bike tyre melted (no insurance – but such is life). Unfortunately the classroom (thatch roof) burnt down with all Rainers books and collection of animal skulls etc. We wondered about safety of the roaming antelope and smaller animals but apparently most survived, although starving.

We both passed the national exam and are now qualified to become Field Guides or manage a lodge or become overland tour guides. Theo, and most other students, also did a 10 day rifle handling course afterwards with Sakkie, enabling him to carry a rifle in a landie if doing a tour. I helped Sakkie with bullets etc and even got to shoot a .22 and a 375 rifle which exploded with such power next to my ear that my new eyebrows would have blown off had the headband of my earmuffs not kept them in place. Like I said, they’re rather high up.

So now that we’re qualified, the next step is finding employment. But that’s another story.