GAUTENGELENG

We drove from Bloemfontein up to Krugersdorp without stopping at laybyes since there just weren’t any but we stopped at a awesome dam outside Welkom, which hundreds of flamingoes and other birds called home. We spent 2 days with binocs glued to our faces and the bird book got well utilized. We were the only people there to enjoy the stunning red sunset skies dotted with red flamingo wings.

We arrived at Krugersdorp in the North West where the pace picked up. We’re staying with Theo’s cousin, Berdien & Jan, who have gone all out to entertain us and make us feel at home. We spent a long weekend with their friends who own property in the Kruger National Park, my first exposure to big game and nogal in their back yard. There are a 100 or so privately owned plots within the park, most without border fences so effectively it means watch your arse when you’re braaing cos you could become supper for a hungry lion. You don’t stray far from the firelight at night and you definitely don’t want to share the river with the crocs in the river running past the front garden. A family of warthogs grazed on the lawn a few meters from us while a family of baboons watched us from a discreet distance. We watched a variety of buck come down for a drink at the river and giraffe moved silently through the tree tops. I’ve seen antelope before but never as part of the food chain. What a great experience. Later that day I plucked up the courage to swing from a moerse high tree in the front garden. All it took was a few beers to pretend the crocs sunning themselves on the riverbank a few meters ahead were plastic ornaments. I yelled for dear life as I did my tarzan thing. I think I’m turning into a pucker game ranger.

We stopped at a few stunning view sites on the 6 hour return trip from Mpumalanga. I’m especially name dropping the provinces cos I’m getting the hang of knowing what lies where, much to my mothers surprise I’m sure. Drie Rondawels and Gods Window offer breathtaking views from the end of the highveld plateau , overlooking the lowveld. I didn’t realize we were talking altitude differences here, I thought highveld and lowveld referred to the length of the actual grass.

Back at Berdien’s house it’s like a miniature friggin petting zoo. They share their house with 11 cats, 2 dogs, 2 birds, 2 tortoises, 2 chickens and a pot belly pig who calls like a baby when he wants to come indoors. She’s nuts about animals – go figure.

I spent yesterday scrubbing the bus; the back inside corner was black from the exhaust fumes and in hindsight I think all those times we stopped to rave about the view we were probably high as a kite for most of the trip. Oh well, Theo has stuck some gum gum on the hole in the exhaust and some silicon to cover the hole where it’s coming inside. We’ll see what happens when we leave here.

I’m seriously worried about our sex life. I can’t even stroke the cats without building up static friction from the electricity in the air but sooner or later we’ll have to give it a go, possibly with a rubber condom and rubber shoes to earth myself. I have anxious memories of collecting Theo a few times after work back in Cape Town, when a greeting kiss would turn into a hair raising spark as we changed seats. And I’m not even talking tongue, imagine what will happen if you put body fluids into the picture. I asked a few people for advice and they told me to always dangle one leg over the side of the bed to earth myself on the floor. They said a little shock now and then kept things spicy anyway and sex in the passage saved many a marriage. In the interim I’ve been a bit tense but it could be due to over exposure of people’s paranoia in the city life again.

I’ve also just discovered that for some reason I thought we were going to do the course at Pilansberg Nature Reserve. Well I got my facts wrong, we’re doing it at Combretum Nature reserve which is 2 or 3 hours drive from here. Don’t know how I got that mixed up, I thought I was getting good at directions. Oh well we got here, tomorrows worries are for tomorrow.